Change

Welcome to 2021! Hope your Christmas and New Years was everything you imagined it to be. As we head into the new year, take some time to reflect on 2020. It was a fast, yet long year that held a lot of emotional weight. It was a trying time for the world as a whole, nevertheless, some people still thrived in their personal lives. *Love to see it!* As you’re reflecting, I recommend using a physical pen and paper and write down your 2020 highs and lows. Next to your highs, write down what led to those moments. What was your work ethic like at the time? Who were the people you surrounded yourself with? What emotions were you feeling during the time? How was your mental, physical, and spiritual state? These are important reflection questions as they are indicators for when you’re at your best. Use these same reflection questions as you reflect on your 2020 lows. Anytime there is a change or shift in your life, aka a change, it’s always important to note what led to the shift.

 I recommend a physical pen and paper because when we type on our phones, computers, or other electronic devices, we may receive notifications or updates that interrupt our train of thought or disrupt our attention. In other words, there is a greater possibility of getting distracted during that reflection process. When you do use a physical pen and paper (journal, notebook, loose paper, etc.), I recommend putting your phone face down and away from you. Give yourself the same amount of attention and dedication you give to checking your social media or checking in with others. After doing your 2020 reflections, if you haven’t already, write your 2021 new years resolutions. What are your plans for the year? They don’t have to be concrete, they can be aspirations, ideas, or a vague concept if you have a hard time narrowing down on your wants. 

This is the perfect time to sit with yourself, get introspective, and find out what motivates you, what makes you happy, what you wouldn’t mind doing short/long term. Don’t rush this process, sit with yourself and your thoughts for as long as your mind, body, and soul push you to do so. As I said before, give yourself the same amount of attention and dedication you give to checking your social media and checking in with others. I’m claiming for myself and for you all that 2021 will bring continuous clarity, a peace of mind, and stability in all aspects-mentally, physically, spiritually, and financially. Now to segway into today’s topic Change. 

Change 

(noun). – The act or instance of making or becoming different 

Have you heard the saying that the only constant in life is change? If you haven’t, now you have! It’s true! Everyday, the day changes, every 60 seconds the time changes, your hairstyle may change, your taste in food, your style, habits, friend groups, life routines, your job, your partner, so on and so forth. The only thing besides death that we are guaranteed in life is change, it’s inevitable

Some changes are subjectively more grand than others. As in moving to a new state or starting a new job is more grand than liking avocados when you use to despise the taste. Some changes clearly have a larger impact on your life than others. How do we embrace, accept, and welcome these larger changes? How do we adjust to a new norm?

Change can be scary because you don’t know what to expect. For instance, if you move, you don’t know if you’ll have nice neighbors, meet new friends, or in other words you don’t know if the change is a good or bad change until you’re somewhat already into the change… or so I used to think. Although change is inevitable, we decide to an extent the impact of said change. How? With our mindset. 

I typically accept all change, bad or good. Accepting it doesn’t mean I agree with it. Accepting change means I now understand that life will life whether I want it to or not. The unknown (usually the cause of fear) is not as scary as we think. That fear, hesitation, and/or anxiety is rooted in our ego. We crave to know and understand everything, all the whys and hows. When the whys and hows don’t align with our subjective standards we internally created, we reject it in a form of anxiety, fear, or another internal emotion that doesn’t make us feel too great. For instance, I’m terrified of spiders (well all creatures that move really lol) but I’m only scared of them because I don’t understand their physical features. I get that some of these creatures are helpful and an important piece to nature as a whole, but I personally feel they could look less scary. They just don’t fit my subjective standard of how I want things to look. 

Accepting change becomes easier the second you check your ego. Check your ego, respectfully. Ask yourself why it’s so important to know what tomorrow yields, what a few days, months, or years from now yields. Not metaphorically speaking, literally ask yourself (look in the mirror or make it a journal prompt) why is it so important to know or understand a day that has yet to come. What do you gain? If I were to tell you the next change in your life will be the best change to ever happen to you, what would do? If I were to tell you the next change in your life will be the worst thing that will happen to you, what would you do? The first may or may not increase your productivity to make sure my words become your reality and the latter may or may not decrease your productivity because although I do not actually know, a part of you will internalize my prediction and believe that your fate is sealed. 

The latter is typically what happens when we don’t accept change or start to worry and or fear change. We start coming up with countless outcomes and scenarios of what could possibly happen. It only takes one negative thought to create a domino effect of bad thoughts. It only takes the one. Going back to that moving scenario, here’s an example of how one thought can lead to a lot more. “What if I don’t like my neighbors, what if they don’t like me, it’s going to be hard living in a place if I don’t get along with my neighbors, we’re going to get into arguments, what if I don’t make friends, wow I’m going to be out there alone, should I really move?” 

Now using the same example but accepting the change… “I’m moving to a new state, wow what an exciting opportunity.” That’s that. Life will life whether you want it to or not. You have no idea what change will bring, but when you accept it and accept the fact that it could potentially be exciting and positively impactful to your overall being, you invite opportunities, growth, and a chance for good shifts to reside. 

This takes mental discipline and practice. Every time you start to think about a change in your life that has yet to come and fear, anxiety, or another internal emotion that doesn’t make you feel good starts to arise, immediately change the subject. Start thinking about how your day is currently going, your next meal, see if you did everything on your daily todo list, just immediately replace future false worries with your current reality. I’m calling them false worries not to insult, because your emotions are always valid. I’m calling them false worries because you are internally creating scenarios that have yet to happen, you have no idea what outcome that change will yield, therefore your worries are…not real, fake…false. 

Change will either feel amazing or teach you a lesson. Either way it’s a win-win

Anticipating a change? Don’t. Worrying about a change? Don’t. Trying to predict what a change will bring? Don’t. Live life in the moment. Life will life. Accept changes as they come and handle problems (when/if) they arise, don’t create a false playground of problems to play with or that is what you’ll end up with. Accept change. Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time!

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See You Next Year

For those who follow my instagram, you already saw this update! For those who don’t, there will be no more posts for 2020. I’m currently working on Chapter 3 of WhatChiSaid as well as instagram posts for WhatChiSaids social media, @whatchisaid_ . You can view both Chapter 1 and 2 here! If you have any topics that you want to know WhatChiThinks, email me or dm me on instagram. Just so topics aren’t repeated, here are the topics my instagram family already requested:

  • Change
  • Dating During a Pandemic
  • Breakups 
  • Introspection

Also, there will be a new post day. I started a new position which interferes with my original post schedule. Will keep you all updated and as always, thanks for rocking with WhatChiSaid! 

Wishing you and yours a Merry Christmas and a happy new year!

*I know this may be trying and lonely times. If you want a holiday pen pal to combat loneliness feel free to email me and remember always seek help if need be! For anyone who needs it, the National Suicide Prevention hotline is 1-800-273-8255 *

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Hurt People, Hurt People

Have you heard the saying, “Hurt people, hurt people?” If not, well now you have. This is why it’s so important to acknowledge trauma from our past and to acknowledge and accept painful moments as they come. Wounds don’t disappear because you make the decision to ignore them, if they are not properly treated they leave a scar. Healing in general is a continuous effort that requires you to actively be present and aware with yourself.

Throughout my past posts I always talked about “doing the internal work,” to better yourself. What does that internal work actually look like though? For starters, it’s really about recognition. Recognizing what sets you off, when your mood changes for the worse, when your energy decreases, when you become uncomfortable around people and situations, in other words…recognizing your triggers. You can choose to ignore painful and hurtful situations as much as you want, but it doesn’t take away from the fact that you lived through and experienced whatever that situation may be. If it hurt you and you don’t acknowledge and accept that pain, you’ll unintentionally hurt others, yourself, and will only continuously have those initial painful emotions resurface by triggers you didn’t even know you had.  The work starts by being present and aware enough to recognize immediately when something feels off

Throughout the day we naturally drift off into deep thought, day dreams, or simply forget what we were doing in the moment. What I like to do is randomly, numerous times throughout the day, is ask myself (in my head not aloud) a series of questions as follows:

What am I doing?

Why am I doing this? 

Who is around me?

What setting am I in?

How do these people and this environment make me feel?

*If you like to journal you can use this for midday journal prompts, I just covered the benefits of journaling on my instagram you can view it by clicking here!*

I call it my “reality check,” because I’m doing a self check whether I’m present and aware of my current reality. Haha get it? lmao  It’s what I’ve been doing for years now, multiple times throughout the day, to help me practice being aware and present in my moments and experiences. I’m now naturally very aware and very present in all moments. This has helped me tremendously in identifying my triggers aka the start of the internal work. 

For instance, something unfortunate and traumatic happened to me my second year in college at the hands of another individual who didn’t respect my body and my boundaries. At first, I didn’t tell anyone what happened to me. I sort of kept it to myself and only confided in my bestfriend at the time, I chose to suppress it. I suppressed it deep. I told myself if I didn’t talk about it, it would be as if it didn’t really happen (again ignoring wounds don’t make them disappear). Eventually, I started to notice I got agitated quickly around a specific demographic of people. I would have a really nasty  attitude or get extremely quiet. I felt uncomfortable around this demographic when my friends would leave me alone around them even if it was just for a few seconds and the discomfort on my face was always clear and noticeable. I would always feel depleted after interactions with this said demographic. I spoke to an on campus counselor about my mood swings, she was horrible I can’t lie *must have been her first day on the job lol*, but I did benefit from one of her takeaways. She recommended that I start keeping note of when my mood changes.

So I started journaling, started asking myself the questions above and eventually realized I ended a lot of my sentences with, “they remind me of *name of individual who hurt me*.” I suppressed the situation so deep, there was a point I forgot it even happened and was unintentionally treating every individual that had even the slightest resemblance of that person horribly. Not only that, I would crave the drama of others because I wanted others to be going through something too *misery loves company*. I was hurt and was hurting people as a result. Hurting myself as well because I would randomly get panic attacks for what I thought was for no reason but came to the realization the actual reason was the situation I attempted to suppress. I eventually confided in my parents, siblings, and a therapist and started the internal work.

I acknowledged what happened to me, acknowledged how it made me feel and all the emotions I experienced as a result of it, acknowledged how it temporarily affected my interactions with certain people, acknowledged how it affected my academic performance for that specific quarter, and honoured and accepted the notion that what I experienced wasn’t okay but that doesn’t mean I don’t have the right to be. I kept telling myself that until I genuinely believed it. I was consistent in my efforts and I eventually got to reap the benefits of being at peace with myself and what happened.

Have you been hurt? Are you currently hurting? Are you doing the internal work to be better and do better for yourself? Are you mindful and aware of your behaviours throughout the day? Ask yourself these questions. Be honest with yourself in the process. That is the most important part. Be HONEST with yourself. You are the only person who knows the extent to which a situation has affected you and you are the only person who knows how much or how little you are hurting. Honor and respect yourself by taking the time to heal. For some it can take minutes to days to heal from a situation, for others it may take years! That is okay! Trust the process, it’s your process. Hurt people, hurt people. Do the internal work for yourself more than anything, the peace of mind that comes with it is a beautiful thing! I can vouch for that. Uncover, acknowledge, and work through those uncomfortable feelings, don’t suppress them. Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time!

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Post Graduation Roadblocks: It’s okay!

Although this post is titled “post graduation” roadblocks, this post is applicable to any roadblock you encounter on your life journey.

Most of us have an idea of what we want out of life. We have hopes, dreams, and aspirations. Some of us have had a game plan since as young as elementary school! We had or still currently have these 5 to 10 year plans and we work endlessly trying to turn these plans into reality. The thing about these detailed plans, we expect them to fall like dominoes, accomplishing one goal after another in a specific order so they fall effortlessly without any hiccups. But what happens when a domino piece is removed? What happens when what we expect to happen doesn’t actually happen? What do we do with that empty space in between the dominoes that was supposed to be filled with another completed goal? In the words of Tobi Lou, just keep going, just keep going.

I graduated May of this year, I had a job waiting for me the day after graduation. All my dominoes were in order, always falling on time. Then BOOM, the world is  in the middle of a global pandemic, COVID-19 completely stopped our way of living for a few months. Companies had to scale back on employees and well…last hired, first fired. I received the “call,” about how my start date was now tentative and they would keep me posted with updates. Long story short, I lost the position. The score read: COVID-1CHI-0. My life went off script, a domino was removed. I was now faced with options. I could be mad, dwell in what could have been and leave that domino space blank or find a new piece to replace it. The latter is better than the former. 

Life goes on regardless of what’s happening in our personal life. The world didn’t stop for me to regroup after I found out I no longer had a job, the world kept moving, and as did I! Of course take the time to process any new shift in your life, but at the same time find the beauty in the shift.

The beauty in my shift was I had an AMPLE amount of free time. For the first time since preschool I had no classes to worry about and no obligations outside of finding something to occupy my time with. I was in paradise, an unemployed paradise. Everyday was a new adventure! Whether it was being laid out at the beach, reading at the park, writing my book, editing a blog post, I had no expectation for the days ahead but to make sure I enjoyed it! Everyone around me kept asking me what’s next, what do I plan to do with my life now and I bluntly replied every time, “I don’t  know, but right now for the first time in my life I’m truly living so I’m going to ride this wave for a bit and then think about that later.” I don’t know what was more amusing, their facial expressions and shift in tone or their concern for my future.

My shift made me realize I was obsessed with creating the perfect future I was rarely living in the present. I was rarely taking the time to appreciate how beautiful, entertaining, and exciting life is when you’re truly living in the moment and taking each day as they come. I genuinely believe me losing that position was the universe telling me to stop and breathe, to live. Clearly I knew I couldn’t live like this forever and that eventually I’d need a source of income, at the time I was living off of the money I received from graduation. I did this for about a month, where I’d do nothing but enjoy what life had to offer. One of the best months of my life at that. 

After that I decided I could have the best of both worlds, actively work towards my next “thing,” but still appreciate life and live in the moment. So, everyday I’d apply for 5 to 10 jobs. I’d do this at the park, beach, somewhere outdoors so when I was done doing that I can continue to live life the way I was living. Some days I’d apply for 15. I knew I wanted to be employed again so I knew I had to actively do the work to get there. However, the point of all of this was to say I turned my roadblock into a pitstop. Changed my perspective. I no longer looked at life as dominoes, but instead as puzzle pieces

The great thing about life being a puzzle…we have all the pieces…everything we need to succeed, live, and understand our lives…we have it all. Sometimes we spend hours working towards completing the puzzle and sometimes we forget we’re working on it. Some sections of the puzzle are more detailed and take more patience and other pieces were already connected and just needed to be added in.  No matter how far along you are in your puzzle, you’re proud of the progress and you know the bigger picture is worth every piece. Every single piece contributes to the grand picture, therefore every piece is important. Even the “roadblock” pieces. 

You ever had a situation you didn’t think you’d overcome? You thought for sure this is the roadblock you just couldn’t get past? Then somehow you made it through? Well those are the pieces of the puzzle that you’re sure we’re added to the box by mistake, they don’t seem to fit anywhere and then viola, you find the space! 

Lifes a puzzle, a very intricate one. Each piece is a moment, experience, pitstop, whatever it may be…and they’re all individually beautiful. So when you have a pitstop in your life that you think you’re not going to get past or you want to melt down and you convince yourself it’s the end of the world. Go ahead, process it! Add that piece to the puzzle, but remember that’s not your last piece to place and practice appreciating the beauty in each piece. Practice shifting your perspective from roadblock to pitstop. A chance to recoup, recharge, and adjust accordingly. I say this all the time in my posts, there is power in our thoughts. Our mindset has the ability to change our reality, how we perceive the world is all we will see it to be. 

You don’t have to be positive 24/7, but when negative things happen or when you think you’ve hit a roadblock. Instead of sitting in that negativity, experience it and let it pass. Shift your attention either to placing the next puzzle piece down or appreciating how far your puzzle has come. Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time!

*The universe is so funny sometimes, this was supposed to be last weeks post. However, due to the ongoing #ENDSARS movement, I wanted to help highlight the issues in Nigeria. The original post day, last week Wednesday, I was still unemployed. Since then, literally in the span of 7 days, I was offered 2 positions with 2 different pharmaceutical companies and had the opportunity to interview with a top 10 fortune 100 company. I’m still currently in awe. I’ve enjoyed my pitstop so much. I’ve recharged more than I ever thought I would and I’m ready to keep adding more pieces to my puzzle. I can’t even tell you how many jobs I applied for and how many rejections I received, yet everyday I was genuinely happy and content because I knew I was doing everything I could to find my next “thing” and there was nothing left to do but be patient, continue to do the internal and external work to prepare myself for what’s to come, and enjoy life while doing so. My perspective on life made all this time worthwhile and although I will start working again soon…I’m still going to continue to live…truly live and enjoy life!*

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END SARS

What is SARS, why is it trending, and why have you been seeing it on your social media and news outlets?

SARS is a Special Anti-Robbery Squad, it is a unit among the Nigerian police force that was established in the 1990s to help combat robbery, motor vehicle theft, kidnapping, cattle rustling, and firearms. They sound like a necessary unit right? WRONG.

Officers among SARS have been abusing their power by stealing from, torturing, and tormenting the same people they are suppose to protect. Just like in America, there is no accountablility for the excessive force officers use against civilians. The #ENDSARS protests began after a video was released showing a young man being unjustifiably shot by SARS officers. This video sparked the peaceful protest in Nigeria and now globally as more protest videos are surfacing from protesters in America and London demanding justice for the deceased, accountability for the officers involved, and calling to have SARS disbanded.

The Nigerian youth have been showing up and out, protesting nonstop for days demanding change! #ENDSARS is just the tip of the iceberg, these protest are a call to end the corruption that’s deeply embedded in the Nigerian government.

The Nigerian government has been known to have its flaws and has been viewed as corrupt by both Nigerians living in Nigeria and Nigerians abroad. However, their lack of intervention especially after yesterdays tragic massacre speaks volumes.

Yesterday, October 20th, 2020, the Nigerian government sent army tanks to attack unarmed peaceful protestors at a sit in at Lekki Toll Gate in Lagos, Nigeria. The unarmed and peaceful protestors were essentially trapped and boxed in while military officers were firing from both sides resulting in the death of over 70 innocent lives. The people are not only asking to #ENDSARS, but in addition asking for Buhari, the current Nigerian president, to resign. He has yet to publically address the tradgedy or plans for moving forward. The resilience, strength, and courage of the Nigerian youth in Nigeria demanding and protesting for change has been inspiring, yet heartbeaking. Please click here if you would like to donate to support victims in Lagos and across Nigeria. The money goes towards food, water, medical bills, ambulances, and other general resources!

Alongside Nigeria, other african countries are fighting battles that need help and attention too.

Congo: “Congo is undergoing a silent holocaust where millions of people are getting killed for Coltan, a natural resource that is needed for electronic devices.” The hashtags being used are #Silentholocaust and #Congoisbleeding

Ivory Coast and Ghana: “There has been an increase in child labor and child trafficking in Ghana and Ivory Coast. Children are trafficked from Burkina Faso and Mali to work in Ghana and Ivory Coast on Cocoa Farms as slaves.” The hashtags being used are #Childtrafficking #Ghana and #IvoryCoast

South Africa: “After the rape and murder of a 19 year old University of Cape Town student named Uyinene Mrwetyana by a 42 year old Post Office worker, protest erupted. According to South African Police Service, a woman is murdered every three hours in South Africa.” The hashtag #AmINext is being used.

Do your own research, spread information, and bring as much awareness as you can to as many people as you can! Black lives matter is a global movement, let’s help uplift our brothers and sisters abroad. Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid. The original post for today “Post Graduation Road Blocks” has been pushed back to next week!

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Friendships Revisited

Welcome to the new month of October, may it bring you your heart desires! What is for you is already yours, always remember that! 

Now let’s get into today’s topic, friendships revisited. This post will cover memories of lost friendships, when to cut friends off, what exactly is a friend, and also the feeling as if you have no friends and what to do! For those who are new to WhatChiSaid, I covered friendships before in chapter 1, but wanted to circle back as it was too broad of a topic to cover in one post. You can view the original friendship post here

The concept of “friendship” is so interesting isn’t it? You are placed on this planet with no real rules on how to navigate your journey and then you meet people along the way who are also trying to figure life out. You may have a million things in common with the people you meet, you may have one thing in common, hey you may have nothing in common…but for some reason you click. You keep hanging out with said individual(s), you start to create memories, and now this once “random” individual has a vital role in your life. You’re comfortable in their presence, you trust them with your deepest of secrets, and now they are no longer just a name you’ve met…they are your friend

Friendships are a gamble, a game of russian roulette with the potential to be a beautiful experience, tiring life lesson, or both. My journey has led me to cross paths with the most amazing individuals…but it has also led me to cross paths with some very interesting people to say the least. The thing with the interesting characters I use to have in my life. Before those friendships went sour, we had the most amazing and fun experiences and that’s what I want to discuss today

Just because you have a falling out with an individual, that doesn’t mean there has to be animosity towards one another. If an individual does you wrong…acknowledge whatever initial feelings of anger, sadness, or disappointment you may have. But, after that? Move accordingly! What does that mean? Well, that means take whatever time you need to decide how you want to handle the situation. 

Do you want to cut the person off? Do you want an apology? Do you want to talk it out? Do you just need some space?

Process your emotions and move accordingly! Once you come to a decision with yourself, release the negative feelings attached with the individual. You did the internal work and came to an understanding with yourself.  So why emotionally harbor bad memories of an individual you became at peace with. I’m reading an amazing book right now (it’s the first book listed in book recommendations at the end of this post) and in the second part of the book, it discusses our hearts and how we open and close it. As in, let’s say a friend named Michelle yells at me and it hurts my feelings or made me mad. My body “registers” this feeling! It registers this feeling and if I don’t let this feeling pass, in that moment I’ll close my heart and I’ll re-close it everytime I’m reminded of the situation. The problem with closing our hearts, we are closing it off to the flow of energy trying to reach our heart chakra. If I don’t eventually “handle,” or in better words become at peace with that situation. Everytime I hear Michelle’s name or I’m reminded of that experience, my body will remember that unprocessed moment where she yelled at me, unknowingly close my heart, and have my mind shift to tunnel vision about that unprocessed situation. Those feelings are really energy. When you do the internal work to learn how to process your emotions in friendships you won’t get sucked into the energy, instead you’ll flow behind it, letting that initial energy take its natural course through you.

With those friendships that taught you life lessons about broken trust, loyalty, and led you to be less accepting of new people, replace those memories with the good you experienced with them. If it’s a lost friendship, I’m not saying rekindle! I’m simply saying, once you decided how you wanted to handle that friendship, stand firm in your decision and be at peace with the concept that you got to experience the good alongside with the bad. Don’t close your heart every time you’re reminded of them, let the energy flow…and flow behind it.  Hopefully the good times are warm enough to hug your energy when you’re reminded of the chilling times with that person.

All this emotional work is all for you! Train yourself to keep your heart “open” as much as possible. Experience people while you have them and let those moments pass when they are no longer in your life. Let’s practice living only in the present! There’s a level of beauty and power that you experience in the present. If you absolutely have to look back, let it be to remember the good in those lost friendships! 

Lets switch gears. When to cut people off, when to distance yourself, or when to talk things out and keep the friendship going when problems arise. The thing is…you already know the answer. You know yourself and how your mind and heart operates better than anyone! You know when a situation makes you feel emotionally heavy and you know when situations are trivial. You know what events you’d be able to tolerate and move past and you know what events are unacceptable and disrespectful. In other words…you know when you should cut someone off, you know when you just need space, and you know when a conversation is enough to rekindle a situation. You’re very much internally aware… so what’s stopping you?

Let’s define a friend. These are a few definitions I found online:

Friend (noun)

A person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection

A person who acts as a supporter of a cause

A person who is not an enemy or who is on the same side

A familiar or helpful thing

A friend is someone who genuinely wants the best for you, there is mutual platonic affection, they support your dreams not downplay them or make you feel like they’re unachievable, they are not an enemy and therefore they don’t move as one-they don’t speak ill of you, spread your business, make you feel uncomfortable in shared spaces, break your trust, lie to you, attack you, you get the point! You know subconsciously you have an understanding of what you expect out of your friendships and what you won’t ever tolerate! When your “friend” stops acting like a friend, cut them off. It’s that simple. *I’m not talking about friends who are going through something emotionally in their personal lives so their change in behaviour is solely a physical representation of their emotional state. Those are case by case scenarios on how you want to continue moving forward*

Some people are meant to be experienced for a season or a few seasons. Don’t let a long history stop you from moving in the direction of your worth. If a friend of 10 years does something that is egregious and hurtful and I feel as if this is where we need to part ways whether it be temporarily or definitely…then so be it. Life will continue, time doesn’t stop, and just like how you randomly met them on your journey…guess what? Your journey doesn’t stop because that friendship ended, you’ll more than likely meet another random individual who you’ll click with and create memories with! That’s the beauty of life! It can be unexpected and dynamic, but it keeps going. When people stop acting like a friend, when you feel you’ve grown apart, when you feel like that season is up…do yourselves both a favor and grow separately

Let’s switch gears for the last time in this post. Like I said, friendships are a very broad topic. Let’s say you’re in a lonely phase in your life where you feel like you don’t have any friends but you’re open to the idea of friendship. I’ve been there, I know how long this period of your life can feel. First, learn to love being alone. Practice being in your own company. Have your phone face down or off so you’re not on social media the entire time, be present in that moment. What do you like to do? What brings you joy? What music do you like? What food do you like? Do you enjoy reading or writing? Get to know yourself in its rawest, most vulnerable form! I say do this first because until you’ve learned to love your own company, there will always be a void that a “friend” can’t fill. Have others add to your life, not be the cause of why you enjoy living. Take yourself out on dates, vibrate higher! When you do this, you’ll naturally attract people who are also on the same journey and who are vibrating at your frequencies! Be patient, the world is filled with billions of people. You’ll attract a friend. Also, we are in the 21st century

I know a lot of people who have found their friend/best friend via apps and social media. So hey, who knows! Try it! Download friend finding apps or social apps in general like twitter or instagram. Connect with people whom you feel match the vibe you want in a friend, reach out to them and set up a friend date. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take!

Those friendships you have that are thriving, flourishing, and somewhat maintaining itself because of the bond that was formed and only deepened with time? Cherish them, experience and appreciate them while they’re here. They may last a lifetime, they may not! Who knows, so appreciate the experiences as they come. As for the rest of those friends in your life that are interesting, questionable, and so forth. Cut them out of your life, take the space you need, or have that conversation. You know what to do. Learn to trust your intuition. Practice how to process your emotions. No more just letting everything go, acknowledge and adjust! Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time! Don’t forget to subscribe below!

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The Untethered Soul-The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer

Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

Remember

~These are just my thoughts and opinions

~If you enjoyed, share with a friend!

~Comments and/or feedback always welcomed!

The Four Agreements 4: Chi Agreed

Part 3-Always Do Your Best

If you’re just making your way to this Four Agreements segment, you can find parts 1 through 3 here! This is the fourth and final agreement! To recap, the first three agreements are Be Impeccable With Your Word, Take Nothing Personally, and Don’t Make Assumptions.

As I mentioned in part 1, if you proactively strive to implement these agreements in your day to day lives, you will unlock a world of peace that you once thought was foreign. This book alongside the agreements it holds has positively reshaped my way of thinking and how I navigate through life. Since I started living by these agreements, my world has changed. It is difficult to even put into words the impact this book has had in my life. When your mindset changes, your world, your reality, or how Don Miguel Ruiz calls it, your “dream” changes too. Our world reflects our inner thoughts, how we subjectively perceive the world as is what we see. Hence, changing how we perceive things, changes our reality and my reality has changed for the better. I now exude peace and calmness and that is all I’ve been attracting. With the people I have been meeting and with the opportunities and interactions I’ve been finding myself in. They have all been a reflection of my new mindset and so far it has been a beautiful experience! Let’s get into the fourth and final agreement of this segment, Always Do Your Best!

This agreement is sort of like the glue to the first three agreements, it holds them together!  The first three agreements mean nothing if you aren’t doing your best when implementing them.

“Don’t expect that you will always be impeccable with your word. Your routine habits are too strong and firmly rooted in your mind. But you can do your best. Don’t expect that you will never take anything personally; just do your best. Don’t expect that you will never make another assumption, but you can certainly do your best”

– Don Miguel Ruiz

It’s important to discuss that your “best,” just like you are, is dynamic. What your best looks like one day is going to look different than what your best looks like on a different day depending on your mood. What does that even mean? Well, if you wake up energized, refreshed, and ready to conquer the day…your best that day will look different than on a day where you wake up feeling kind of “off,” tired, or depleted. Work with what you have and what you’re feeling, just make sure it’s the best foot you can put forward that day!

Don says, do you best, nothing more nothing less! When you do your best, you leave no room for the opinions of others. Why? Because, you did your best! How can someone judge you based off your best? Not that they should be judging anyways, but you get the point! When you do your best, you can free yourself from regret. When you strive to do your best, what is there to be disappointed in? There is nothing greater than your best… so when you always do your best there are only lessons to be learned, never failure and I want to see you consistently win!!

This agreement speaks for itself so it’s short and sweet, I’m going to end this post with a story that Don put in the book:

There was a man who wanted to transcend his suffering so he went to a Buddhist temple to find a Master to help him. He went to the Master and asked, “Master, if I meditate four hours a day, how long will it take me to transcend?” The Master looked at him and said, “If you meditate four hours a day, perhaps you will transcend in ten years.” Thinking he could do better, the man then said, “Oh, Master, what if I meditated eight hours a day, how long will it take me to transcend?” The Master looked at him and said, “If you meditate eight hours a day, perhaps you will transcend in twenty years.”

“But why will it take me longer if I meditate more?” the man asked. The Master replied, “You are not here to sacrifice your joy or your life. You are here to live, to be happy, and to love. If you can do your best in two hours of meditation, but you spend eight hours instead, you will only grow tired, miss the point, and you won’t enjoy your life. Do your best, and perhaps you will learn that no matter how long you meditate, you can live, love, and be happy.”

Do your best, nothing more nothing less. Put your best foot forward in all that you do! Be Impeccable With Your Word, Take Nothing Personally, Don’t Make Assumptions and Always Do Your Best! When you find yourself slipping back into old habits, start over. Regroup, realign, and do your best as you attempt to start fresh. Practice these agreements, train your mind, and reap the sweet fruits of your mental labor. You didn’t come across this post by chance, if this is the push you need to want better for yourself then take it as that. A peace of mind is possible, quieting your thoughts when they get overwhelming is possible, attracting and manifesting all that’s meant for you is possible! This is all possible and yes, you deserve all the above! It’s going to take a level of mental practice and discipline, but very much possible and worth the try.

I highly recommend if you haven’t to read this book in it’s entirety. Yes, I covered all the agreements, but it doesn’t compare to the literary genius that is Don Miguel Ruiz. Thank you for following along in this Four Agreements segment, you can find the other 3 parts here! Implement these agreements into your life and always do your best while doing so! Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time! Don’t forget to subscirbe below so you can be notified anytime a new post drops!

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Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz

Remember

~These are just my thoughts and opinions

~If you enjoyed, share with a friend!

~Comments and/or feedback always welcomed!

The Four Agreements 3: Chi Agreed

Part 3- Don’t Make Assumptions

Assumption: (noun). A thing that is accepted as true or as certain to happen, without proof.

If you’re just making your way to this Four Agreements segment, you can view the posts for the  first and second agreement: Be Impeccable With Your Words and Don’t Take Anything Personally, by clicking here!

Welcome to part three, agreement three, Don’t Make Assumptions! This agreement has recently saved me from so much unnecessary stress and I’m more than thankful this agreement crossed my path when it did. Let’s get straight into it! 

“We have the tendency to make assumptions about everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth. We could swear they are real.”

– Don Miguel Ruiz

Don says we create a lot of emotional poison by making assumptions and I agree! This agreement is actually somewhat connected to the second agreement, Don’t Take Anything Personally. For instance, let’s say you call an individual and they do not answer. Not only did they not answer, they did not return your call. Now let’s say you make the assumption that there is an issue between the both of you because clearly there has to be right? They did not answer your call and it’s the end of the day and no call back, so clearly there has to be a problem between you two that you’re unaware of right? You are now somewhat offended and you’re taking it personally. How dare this person treat you like this over a problem you’re unaware of! Keep the imagination running. Now, you’re both at an event and you intentionally go out of your way to ignore said individual and you’re making it obvious you’re ignoring them…greeting everyone around them and skipping over them. The other individual senses some hostility, but instead of making the assumption that there is an issue and taking your disregard of their presence personally, they ask to speak to you privately.

They ASK if everything is okay. You then bring up the phone call incident and guess what…it was a misunderstanding! They explain how their workload picked up and you called while they were in a meeting, they had every intention of calling back but they were so drained by the end of the day they fell asleep and simply forgot the next day. They also now feel bad and apologize because they would never intentionally ignore you or want you to feel ignored. This was a mature interaction. Imagine if the other individual matched your original energy and started ignoring you at the event too and this hostility carried on for days, weeks, or even months over a simple misunderstanding…over an assumption. Don says when we make assumptions, and believe we are right about the assumptions; we defend our assumptions and try to make someone else wrong. This was perfectly played out in this scenario.

“Without making assumptions your word becomes impeccable. With clear communication, all of your relationships will change, not only with your partner, but with everyone else. You won’t need to make assumptions because everything becomes so clear.”

-Don Miguel Ruiz

I don’t know about you, but clarity sounds beautiful to me. I use to make assumptions about everything, down to a person ending a text with a period when they usually don’t use punctuation marks. I would say, “Oh they’re upset with me” “They no longer want to be friends” “I’m a horrible texter and now they’re frustrated with me,” so on and so forth. I’d come to conclusions based on feelings and deep rooted insecurities instead of facts. As a result, I’d trap myself in a prison of my own thoughts. It was never a good feeling, it would always leave me emotionally drained

It only takes one seed of doubt, fear, or sadness to be planted for a whole forest full of it to grow. When we make assumptions and take them as truth this is what we are potentially doing to ourselves. We are potentially and unknowingly planting a forest rooted in not only a hypothetical, but also of that fear, doubt, or sadness. 

When you are able to, ask questions for clarity! If you can’t ask questions, assume you know nothing about whatever you’re inquiring about…well because you don’t. Don’t assume your partner or friends know what you want, how you want to be loved, or what makes you happy. Don’t assume when someone treats you a certain way that it’s because of something you did and don’t take it personally either. Don’t assume the intentions of the people who enter your life. If you don’t have proof, if you don’t have all the answers, don’t assume…period! 

 “Just saying this sounds easy, but I understand that it is difficult to do. It is difficult because we so often do exactly the opposite… Becoming aware of these habits and understanding the importance of this agreement is the first step. But understanding its importance is not enough. Information or an idea is merely the seed in your mind. What will really makes the difference is action”

-Don Miguel Ruiz

Everything is always easier said than done, I get it. It takes a level of mental discipline, practice, and effort to ingrain these agreements into our way of life. What really helped me with this agreement is checking myself when I find myself assuming something because of my emotions when there is no proof. I literally stop in my train of thought and say in my head, “I honestly have no idea, I’m unable to ask the questions I need answers to, so I’m no longer making this an inner topic of conversation.” Not only do I say this to myself, I BELIEVE it and stop thinking about it. It has for sure taken me sometime, but overtime it’s become second hand nature. Once I started doing this, I realized how often I made assumptions…and it was often. I rarely make assumptions now. I’m at peace with the idea that I simply do not know everything and there are things I may want to know that I won’t get the answers to. Releasing the need of validating my own inner ego that craves to know everything has brought me so much peace and I’m honestly extremely proud of the progress I’m making in my personal growth by implementing these agreements.

If you can ask, ask! If you can’t, don’t assume…because you actually don’t know! Don’t make assumptions and practice the other two agreements I’ve covered so far as well; Be Impeccable With Your Word and Take Nothing Personally. Actively implement these agreements into your life and let me know how your world changes! There is only one more agreement to cover that ends this segment, but for now remember if you don’t have the answers and there is no proof, you simply don’t know and that’s okay! Start checking yourself when you find yourself making assumptions. Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time! Don’t forget to subscirbe below so you can be notified anytime a new post drops!

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Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson

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~These are just my thoughts and opinions

~If you enjoyed, share with a friend!

~Comments and/or feedback always welcomed!

The Four Agreements 2: Chi Agreed

Part 2-Don’t Take Anything Personally

If you’re just making your way to this Four Agreements segment, you can view the first agreement,Part 1- Be Impeccable With Your Words, by clicking here

In part 1, I gave a synopsis of the entirety of the book and then dove into what it means to be impeccable with your words. Before Don Miguel Ruiz plunged into the four agreements we should make to ourselves, he discussed  how we are domesticated beings! I’m going to briefly talk about what he meant by this as it is important to this second agreement, Don’t Take Anything Personally.

Don Miguel Ruiz says that everything we see and hear is a dream…yes, you in this moment right now is a dream! Society as we know it as an outside dream that was formed by humans, and as we are children, they hook our attention and present to us the rules of this outside dream. Don discusses how the outside dream teaches us what to believe, all the way down to the language we speak.

“It was not your choice to speak English. You didn’t choose your religion or your moral values — they were already there before you were born. We never had the opportunity to choose what to believe or what not to believe. We never chose even the smallest of these agreements. We didn’t even choose our own name. As children, we didn’t have the opportunity to choose our beliefs, but we agreed with the information that was passed to us from the dream of the planet via other humans.”

-Don Miguel Ruiz

The best way to describe our domestication is how Don did, he compares our domestication as children to how we domesticate a dog. We were trained essentially. Punished for certain things we did and rewarded for others, and eventually we learn this concept of “right” and “wrong” and start to strive to act in a way that reaps reward instead of punishment. However, the catch is, what we learned as right and wrong is rooted in others beliefs…our parents, teachers, siblings, anyone who had the opportunity to punish or reward us. The foundation of our morals were pretty much instilled in us by others and we eventually get to an age or stage in our life where we develop the ability of choice in morals. Where we have the option to rebel from our domestication and construct our own agreements to how we should live or accept the agreements we learned as children. Now that there’s some understanding of our domestication, let’s get into part two, agreement two- Don’t Take Anything Personally.

I know Don says the first agreement is the most important, however for me, this one has been the most impactful to my life. It has literally reshaped my way of thinking and how I navigate through life. It helped me reminisce on the bad that was done to me in the past and become at peace with those situations, and it has taught me grace. Don calls taking things personally personal importance, and explains how it is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about us. 

“During the period of our education, or our domestication, we learn to take everything personally. We think we are responsible for everything. Me, me, me, always me!”

-Don Miguel Ruiz

When we were younger, we were trained to believe that everything that happened to us was a result of something we did or said. As in, if we were yelled at, whooped, punished and so forth it was because we were doing or saying something we shouldn’t have or simply we did something that someone else believed was wrong and as a result the negative outcome was our consequence. As much as we try to break away from our domestication, it’s so deep rooted and ingrained in us that it’s subconsciously hard to break away from. It’s important to know that this is not true. Nothing other people do is because of you. A person’s reaction, outburst, retaliation, and so forth is solely because of them. Solely. Even if you cussed somebody out, called them all types of insults and they punch you, or “knock you out.” They didn’t hit you because of what you said, they hit you because they believed your words and took your anger as an attack to their character and felt an urge to react. They took it personally. It wasn’t your words that caused the punch, it was the insecurity that they’ve accepted that made them react. You may have made them aware of an insecurity, but you didn’t grab their fist and put it to your face. You following?  *and no I’m not saying go around cussing people out, I may be using these agreements in my personal life but you will encounter someone who is not and who will drag you lmao*

“Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”

– Don Miguel Ruiz

When someone calls you out your name, physically hurts you, or whatever it is that can be done that negatively affects you, it’s not because of who you are..it’s because of who they are. They can be intimidated by the person you are becoming, they can be going through personal situations that are weighing on them heavily emotionally and mentally, to be honest it can be a million things happening in their own reality and you got the short end of the stick and became the outlet of their frustrations. It sucks, truly. But, when we learn that it has nothing to do with us and everything to do with them we can live a life free of pointless suffering and anger.

You know I always use personal stories as reference, well sometime ago I was put into a situation that harmed me. In that moment, I was overwhelmed with anger and frustration, and I didn’t know how to calm myself down. I took it personally and reacted. Before I reacted, I felt myself wanting to react, so I tried to remove myself from the situation and due to circumstance it was impossible. I tried to do everything I could to remedy the situation and although it had nothing to do with me, I essentially failed myself in the moment by taking it personally. As a result, I suffered because I filled myself with anger. That very same night, I was sitting down, replaying everything that happened and accepted the fact I was simply a victim to someone who was going through something in their reality and that pain they were feeling was projected onto me. It was hard to accept this at first, because I felt extremely wronged. I had to really look deep into myself and ask why am I making this about me. Yes I was affected physically, but the persons action was pointless…what caused their action? That was what was really of upmost importance. As soon as I came to the realization that the cause of the action had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with who they were internally…the high tide of anger that initially overcame me turned into a low tide of understanding and I was at peace. It took me a few hours to get to this point after the situation, now I’m working on trying to make this my immediate reaction. Had understanding been my immediate response, the wave of anger I initially felt would have been non existent. It takes energy to be mad and react, I depleted myself emotionally for hours…and for what? There was no gain, just lost energy because I took the situation personally. 

 

What I love so much about this agreement is that Don even talks about not taking what we hear in our head personally either. Do you ever have random negative thoughts about yourself? If not…well this is awkward. If you have, we have that in common

“Even the opinions you have about yourself are not necessarily true; therefore, you don’t need to take whatever you hear in your own mind personally. The mind has the ability to talk to itself, but it also has the ability to hear information that is available from other realms….We have a choice whether or not to believe the voices we hear within our own minds, just as we have a choice of what to believe and agree with in the dream of the planet.”

-Don Miguel Ruiz

So as I am reiterating to take nothing personally, I literally mean NOTHING, not even your internal voice sometimes. When you look at it this way, it makes it easier to not take things personally from others. If our mind has the ability to lie to us, why do we take what others do unto us as truth? Why do we take it personally?

Let me be VERY clear though,  although you shouldn’t take things personally, do NOT accept disrespect. Please. Please. Please. Know your worth in all forms of relationships, both platonic and romantic. Know your boundaries, set them, and if people continuously break them, acknowledge that and act accordingly. Whether it’s ending said relationship or distancing yourself, priortize your peace first! You don’t have to take their actions personally, but if someone shows you who they are…believe them the first time

I have this agreement, Don’t Take Anything Personally, as well as the other three agreements written on index cards and they are pinned on top of my desk so I see them everyday. I get it, these agreements are new to us. We have somewhat been aware of all of them or introduced to them at some point in our lives, but actively putting them into practice takes work. It takes work, but the benefits are massive to our growth and well-being. The next time you’re put into any situation, I hope you realize what was done onto you was not, and will never have anything to do with you. Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! See you next time! Don’t forget to subscirbe below so you can be notified anytime a new post drops!

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Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff and It’s All Small Stuff: Simple Ways to Keep the Little Things from Taking Over Your Life by Richard Carlson

Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

Remember

~These are just my thoughts and opinions

~If you enjoyed, share with a friend!

~Comments and/or feedback always welcomed!

The Four Agreements 1: Chi Agreed

Part 1- Be Impeccable With Your Words

Impeccable: (adj.) in accordance with the highest standards of propriety; faultless. Not liable to sin.

Guess who’s back back back? Back again gain gain? Chi is back back back, tell a friend friend friend!

*If you want to get straight into this post skip this next paragraph*

Before I get into this post, I want to quickly talk about why I haven’t had a post in awhile. When I first created WhatChiSaid, I wanted it to be honest, vulnerable, and create a platform for people to start dialogue with themselves and with others in hopes that it leads to positive trends in their healing journey. The goal has always been sentimental and emotional impact from an honest and open heart. If it’s one thing you’ve taken away from my posts, both on this site and on my instagram, I hope that it’s healing isn’t linear. I’ve been as transparent as I can be without giving away too much of my personal life. *You know what you post on the internet never goes away and people love to lurk* Over these past few months I was reminded of a very traumatic experience and it took a toll on my mental state. I didn’t feel right posting any posts when I knew it was coming from a place of pain and hurt instead of love and healing. I don’t want to paint an inaccurate picture, I was still fine overall! I just needed to take time to myself to remind me of what makes me so great, because I’m a dynamic, strong, and beautiful being inside and out and can forget that at times. These past few months were filled with pouring into myself with a lot of park and beach days relaxing, reading and writing, figuring out my post grad life, and pouring into my platonic relationships as well as with family members and it’s been refreshingly amazing. I love WhatChiSaid, it’s my blog baby that has probably helped me more than it has anyone else and I’m ecstatic to be back with new posts! If you aren’t already, subscribe below and follow @whatchisaid_ on instagram…now lets get into today’s topic!

A few months ago I was introduced to my new favorite book, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. If you had a conversation with me within the time frame I’ve stopped posting, I probably found some way to mention this book in the conversation! Inspiring is an understatement and I best describe it  as a roadmap to a peace of mind. To quickly summarize, it is based on Toltec wisdom and it offers four agreements we should make to ourselves, that if used in practice can reconstruct our lives in the best way possible. Hence introducing us to a new world of personal transformation where we stop limiting ourselves from the potential of being great! Sounds deeply amazing right? Well, IT IS! I loved it so much! It has helped me tremendously in my healing process to the point where I decided to do my reopening blog segment on it. Over the next 8 weeks *because WhatChiSaid is every other Wednesday* I’ll dive into a four part segment catered to The Four Agreements. Welcome to part one, agreement one-Be Impeccable With Your Word.

“Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love” -Don Miguel Ruiz

Don Miguel Ruiz states this agreement as the most important with reasons being we use our words to express and manifest. He actually calls our words a force…a power. I agree wholeheartedly, but just like all power it can be used for good or evil and we are the deciders of how we use said power

Before reading this book, I defined sin as something you do that distances yourself from God. Don defines it as everything you feel or believe that goes against yourself. What a game changing definition and it makes so much sense! God made us in his image, so when we go against ourselves, we are going against our creator. Being impeccable with your words means to be without sin with you word, to not say or express words that go against yourself and others! 

Our words are so powerful and when used negatively can create a domino effect of negativity. I’m going to start with speaking  ill of others first. A few weeks ago, someone asked me how an individual who is no longer a friend of mine is doing. They were unaware we no longer communicated because some situations are meant to stay between you and the person involved . I was READY to go in about how much I dislike said individual, I was ready to run their name into the GROUND. I kid you not I had a full clip of insults forming at the tip of my tongue. I literally opened my mouth ready to fire and paused and said to myself, “Be Impeccable With Your Words Chi.” Instead of spewing the hurricane of insults that first came to mind, I ended up saying… “Honestly, I have no idea how they are doing. We don’t talk anymore,” and I left it at that. Mind you I do this normally when I don’t keep in contact with people and someone asks me about them, this person in particular was triggering.

If I had said what I initially wanted to say, I would’ve painted an absolutely horrible image in the other person’s mind about the individual they asked me about. I would have planted a biased seed of negativity in this person’s head solely because of MY bad experience. In the words of Don Miguel Ruiz, I would’ve spread word poison. The person I am no longer friends with, their character is NOT solely based on their experience with me. Just because I had a bad experience with them, doesn’t mean everyone they come in contact with will have that same outcome, but with my words I had the potential to make someone dislike a person they never personally known…that’s power. Another reason I stopped myself in my tracks was because as soon as I was about to speak, I no longer took what they did to me personally and in that same breath where I said I have no idea, I became at peace with the situation. But I’ll dive more into not taking things personally in part 2! 

Continuing with how we speak to others and the power of the tongue, imagine spewing word poison to someone with a deep rooted insecurity you knew nothing about or someone with a fragile personality. Keep that imaginiaton running, let’s say  out of anger or frustration you called them ugly, useless, stupid, or any other insult that has a connection to confidencenow let’s imagine they believe and internalize your insults! 

“Whenever we hear an opinion and believe it, we make an agreement, and it becomes part of our belief system” –Don Miguel Ruiz

Wow, right? Would you be okay with knowing someone is walking around with a cloud of insecurity hovering over their heads based off of your words that they took as truth? Very powerful…but more so villain like and not okay. I’m no angel and have for sure spread word poison… ew right? I used to say it was my defense mechanism but in reality, looking back, 9 times out of 10 I was projecting and we can only thank God for the growth because I can’t imagine doing that now intentionally.  

I’m not going to talk about being impeccable when it comes to self too much because I’ve discussed this on my instagram. But to touch base, speak to yourself with love always, even on the harder days when you are feeling down. The power our words hold is mighty. Our words can define, reshape, and or create realities. When you speak negatively about yourself enough, at some point you’re going to start believing it! As soon as you believe it, you have now defined your reality built on the idea that you’re not good enough…you’d be living in a lie, because you are good enough. You are more than good enough, you are the author of your life story, the playmaker! Yes, God is the map and assists you on your journey, but you’re the one that gets to decide your destination. As long as your breathing your life has purpose, the world is impacted by your presence, and you simply being…surviving in this world, is a reflection of your inner strength. Give yourself more credit! Look in the mirror every morning and learn to love the person looking back, and it starts with your words. Tell yourself how amazing you are and why. You are and will always be enough and you should remind yourself of such daily.

These past two months I wasn’t posting, I still affirmed to myself DAILY of how amazing I am because I was made uniquely in Gods image and my spirit is strong and beautiful. I always speak about myself kindly…well because words are powerful, so be impeccable with it! Why? Because that’s #WhatChiSaid! Okay, okay because that’s what Don Miguel Ruiz said! See you next time! Don’t forget to subscirbe below so you can be notified anytime a new post drops!

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Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz

You are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Live an Awesome Life by Jen Sincero

Remember

~These are just my thoughts and opinions

~If you enjoyed, share with a friend!

~Comments and/or feedback always welcomed!